Wives are gifted with special 'vibes'...don't play-play~!

I am glad to be of help. Even if helping simply means listening and asking some relevant questions. This morning, a friend shared how she discovered that her husband of ten years was having an affair with another woman. While listening to her story, I come to learn a few lessons about life. There are two in particular, which I derived from one part of the conversation (Via FB), which I wish to share here.

Her story (produced here with her permission), in a few lines:

"i x tau pun dier ader affair

sumer kantoi nyer hal

tuhan tu maha kaya

i ikhlas ngan dier

so semua bukti tu i dpt

dier jenuh dok sorok

i rasa x sedap hati .... sbb tgk dier mcm dah lain

tanya dier of cos la x ngaku kan

then i doa je lah

kalau betul la apa aku sangka ni ya allah tolong la tunjukkan bukti

pooff! satu2 bukti mai

now i have all his pix n sex tape dgn pompuan tu

while he's still married to me!"

The power of a wife's prayer!

"Ya Allah tolong la tunjukkan bukti!"

She had some 'uneasy feeling' that her husband was undergoing some change, and was keeping something from her. She did what she was taught to do, she turned to Allah for help.

Although she didn't like what she found out, she was relieved from the burden of suspicion. God has answered her do'a and she got all the evidence.

She and her (ex)husband ended with a divorce and the ex(husband) did marry the other woman.

A wife's intuition!

"i rasa x sedap hati..."

God creates women with many strengths. One of them is, a gift of intuition. A mother, for instance can 'feel' the feeling of her children. A wife, can 'feel' if her husband is cheating on her. The difference is, some wives would investigate, and others choose to ignore the 'vibes'. But, 'vibes' they do have...~!

As an additonal resource to readers, I pasted below what I found on a website.

Cheating Husband - Facts and Advice

Listed below are the most common findings about cheating husbands.

• Men are more likely than women to cheat. It is estimated that close to 50% of all men will cheat at some point in their lives.

• Husbands are also more likely to engage in online cheating – using chat rooms, webcams and online services to arrange sexual encounters

• The more money a husband makes, the more likely he is to be unfaithful. Having more money brings more opportunity and wealth tends to attract more women.

• A lack of sexual excitement or the routine of having sex with the same person often leads men to stray. Men are more likely to be drawn to the thrill of having sex with someone new (also see, Coolidge Effect).

• Husbands are less likely than wives to consider leaving their spouse when having an affair (see, will he leave his wife)

• A cheating husband is more likely to have an affair with someone who is younger than his wife.

• When having a one-night stand, men are less choosy than women when it comes to selecting someone to have sex with.

• Husbands are more likely to feel that cheating is justified due to the lack of sex within a marriage.

• Husbands are much more likely than wives to be serial cheaters (also see, husband constantly cheats and cheating husband survey)

Re-branding oneself!

Brand is normally associated with products! We buy certain brands because we believe in the promises made by the brands through advertisements or through their sheer image or prestige! To illustrate, today I bought an iphone4 as a birthday present for my wife because I believe it is the coolest thing to have right now, and I don't have to hint to her it is expensive, she know it is~! Thus the iphone4 as a brand gives the perception of expensive, and cool thing to have~! In marketing we call this as the brand positioning!

Every morning, when I look in the mirror, I am reminded of 'me' as a brand. With each wink I give to myself, I reinforce my own 'brand' - Confident, Optimistic, and Fun Loving~! (I hope so lah anyway! hahaha). The way I dress, reflects me as a brand too - smart & casual, not too loud nor too dull, professional yet warm! My work ethics and my behavior speak the loudest about my 'professionalism as a brand', continuously raising the bar for myself and for others around me, and always curious about how things can be done better~! (Once again, please allow me to perasan a little bit lah. hahaha).

I do believe by 'branding' oneself - it can serve as one of the most effective ways to stand out in this over crowded world, at work place and in social setting.

Simon Cowell of the American Idol earned tons of money through his brand as 'Mr. Nasty' who wore tight T Shirt on the show. 

Beckham, branded himself as the player who is known the world over for his 'Bend it like Beckham!'
Even if your intention is not get rich, branding yourself can do wonders to your own sense of self-worth!

I was once branded as a 'Romeo'! People branded me based on what people see, hear, reading what I write, and what others have said about me. True or otherwise, others' perception is reality to them. I can't change that. I can change the way I am, which hopefully will change the way people perceive me. 

I have re-launched myself my times over. Amongst other things, I did it by being more selective in the topics I chose to write in my blog. I re-branded myself, also, by taking different type of roles in the society; for example I led the Malaysian Association in UAE for one term and hosted many social events for Malaysians at our home in Dubai. Those activities managed to shape people's perception in certain ways.

It is never too late to re-launch yourself!

If you have just resigned from a terrible job and is moving on to a new employer - then seize the opportunity to re-launch yourself!

If you have just come out from a bad relationship, and want to move on in life - it is a good time to re-brand yourself. 

The best brand for you is - to be yourself! To let your inner-self come out in the open, leveraging on your strengths and your passion. To be able to lower your guard, to be confident with what you have to say, and be comfortable with who you are - that is the most sustainable brand you can wish for.

That is common sense, you may say!

It is, except that it is not so commonly practiced.

So very often, we brand ourselves not the way we are, but the way we think others want to see us! So we suppressed our thoughts, we even wear clothes which are approved by our social circles, and be seen at places where others expect us to be! 

What is your "brand?" Think about it...Whether you like it or not, you are being branded by others. It is time you take control of your 'brand' and communicate clearly, in the way you behave, dress, talk, circle of friends you keep, and things you do and own. The message must be about who you are!

Di jangka 9000 Pelajar Malaysia dari Mesir akan di pindahkan ke Saudi!

Setakat hari ini, sudah 2000+ pelajar Malaysia dari Mesir sudah di pindahkan ke Jeddah Saudi Arabia, sebagai langkah penyelamatan oleh kerajaan Malaysia. Ada yang bujang dan ramai juga yang berkeluarga bersama anak2 kecil. Ada yang murung, ada juga yang bersemangat tinggi menceriakan suasana, menyembunyi perasaan di hati - keliru, redha, takut, pasrah bercampur aduk. Terlalu ramai yang datang sehelai sepinggang, tidak berwang.

Di Jeddah ada lebih kurang 800 Malaysians yang berdaftar dengan Consulate.

Alhamdullillah, pihak Consulate dan Tabung Haji, serta Malaysia Airline begitu prihatin bertungkus lumus tidak mengenal penat lelah demi anak bangsa, tanpa mengira parti politik apakah di dokong mereka!

Lebih membanggakan apabila sukarelawan, dan Kelab Malaysian Jeddah (KMJ), turut di barisan hadapan menyalurkan tenaga dan sumbangan material.

Di adakan bilik gerakan di kediaman penempatan sementara, dan jika ada ibu bapa saudara mara ingin hubungi, boleh telefon di number ini.

Bilik Operasi Kompleks Tabung Haji Madinatul Hujjaz, Jeddah, Saudi Arabia


Tel: 00 966 2630 16 38 atau  00 966 5671 55 710

Di beritakan, anggaran pelajar yang akan di pindahkan ke Jeddah akan menyentuh 9000 semuanya.

Persoalan :

Adakah pelajar-pelajar yang dibawa keluar dari Mesir yang berada di Arab Saudi sekarang layak menerima zakat atau tidak?

Jawapan :

1. Dari sudut situasi mereka :

Andai kita melihat kepada situasi mereka yang akan dibawa pulang ke Malaysia dan melakukan transit di Jeddah terlebih dahulu, kita dapati sebahagian besar daripada mereka langsung tidak ada persediaan untuk bermusafir pulang ke Malaysia.

Ini dapat dilihat kerana sebahagian daripada mereka ada yang datang sehelai sepinggang tanpa membawa bekalan kewangan atau pakaian yang cukup.

Ada juga daripada mereka yang bersiap untuk pulang ke Malaysia tetapi kerana terkandas di lapangan terbang Mesir beberapa hari menyebabkan duit poket habis digunakan untuk membeli makanan di lapangan terbang yang harganya melambung tinggi dan ditambah buruk lagi apabila duit tidak dapat diambil melalui mesin ATM.Akibatnya keadaan mereka juga terputus bekalan kewangan untuk pulang ke Malaysia.

2. Melihatkan situasi mereka sebegini adakah ada ruang untuk mereka menerima zakat daripada mereka yang berkemampuan?

Jawabnya YA!

Dalilnya diterangkan oleh Allah Ta'ala dalam surah at Taubah ayat 60:

ﭽ ﮠ ﮡ ﮢ ﮣ ﮤ ﮥ ﮦ ﮧ ﮨ ﮩ ﮪ ﮫ ﮬ ﮭ ﮮ ﮯ ﮰﮱ ﯓ ﯔ ﯕﯖ ﯗ ﯘ ﯙ ﯚ ﭼ التوبة: ٦٠

Maksudnya : Sesungguhnya sedekah-sedekah (zakat) itu hanyalah untuk orang-orang fakir, dan orang-orang miskin, dan amil-amil yang mengurusnya, dan orang-orang muallaf yang dijinakkan hatinya, dan untuk hamba-hamba yang hendak memerdekakan dirinya, dan orang-orang yang berhutang, dan untuk (dibelanjakan pada) jalan Allah, dan orang-orang musafir (yang keputusan bekal) dalam perjalanan. (Ketetapan hukum yang demikian itu ialah) sebagai satu ketetapan (yang datangnya) dari Allah. Dan (ingatlah) Allah Maha Mengetahui, lagi Maha Bijaksana. (60)

Antara asnaf lapan atau mereka yang layak menerima zakat ialah lapan golongan, salah satu daripada lapan golongan ini yang disebutkan oleh Allah Ta'ala ialah Ibn Sabil (orang-orang musafir (yang keputusan bekal) dalam perjalanan).

3. Apakah pendapat ulama' dalam menafsirkan ibn Sabil dalam ayat di atas?

 Imam at Tabari dalam tafsirnya Jami' al Bayan menafsirkan Ibn Sabil orang yang bermusafir dari satu Negara ke Negara yang lain.

 Berkata Imam Ibn Kathir dalam tafsirnya Tafsir al Quran al Azim Ibn Sabil ialah Orang yang merantau dan tidak mempunyai bekalan untuk meneruskan perjalanannya,maka hendaklah diberi zakat dan sedekah kepadanya untuk sampai ke Negara yang berikutnya.

 Syeikh Qardhawi menyebut maksud Ibn Sabil dalam kitabnya Fiqh Zakat: Di sisi Jumhur Ulama, Ibn Sabil ialah orang bermusafir dari satu Negara ke satu Negara.

Dari Ibn Zaid katanya : 'Ibn Sabil ialah orang yang bermusafir sama ada kaya atau miskin, tiba-tiba dalam masa perjalanannya di timpa musibah sama ada kehilangan bekalan,rosak bekalan tersebut atau kehabisan bekalan yang dibawa, maka wajib mereka dibantu dengan zakat dan sedekah.

Kesimpulannya :

Jadi di sini bolehlah kita simpulkan daripada pendapat Ulama' bahawa zakat boleh diberikan kepada pelajar-pelajar Mesir yang berada di Jeddah untuk membantu dari segi kewangan mereka sehinggalah mereka selamat sampai di Malaysia sekali pun mereka tergolong dalam orang yang kaya di tanah air sendiri berdalilkan hadith Rasulullah SAW :

عن أبي سعيد الخدري، عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: لا تحل الصدقة لغني إلا لثلاثة: في سبيل الله، أو ابن السبيل، أو رجل كان له جار فتصدق عليه، فأهداها له

Maksudnya : Dari Abi Said al Khudri dari Nabi SAW bersabda : "Tidak halal sedekah(zakat) kepada orang kaya kecuali dalam tiga keadaan : Dalam jihad di jalan Allah atau Ibn Sabil atau seseorang (yang kaya) yang mempunyai jiran lalu ia bersedakah kepada jirannya kemudian jirannya memberi hadiah kepadanya."

Wallah hu aklam!

Latest: Kumpulan pertama 400 pelajar yang di pindahkan ke Jeddah sudah berlepas pulang ke tanah air.

Penghargaan kita kepada Kerajaan Saudi kerana memberi ruang dan bersedia menerima penindahan warga negara Malaysia ke negara ini.